The eventful adventures of Mary Croquette: The store room

Hi there, I´m Mary Croquette

Let me tell you about…

THE STORE ROOM

This fabulous space that stores all shapes and sizes of items that the whole office wants but you´re sick of seeing, and when you go to tradeshows you want nothing to do with the little gift bags, the caps with an attached fan, the mugs that wish you a great day and the polo shirts that fade and shrink in the wash.

Every time it´s my turn to go to the store room to make up the boxes, I try my best to do it outside of working hours or else I hide and close the door because it´s as if they sniff it out and bit by bit their heads poke up at the door like when a child wants to ask you for something that they shouldn´t but… they really don´t give a damn and do it anyway. “Hey, what´s up? I don´t suppose there´s anything left?”

ANYTHING LEFT! And you´ve got the urge to say, well yeah, I have so many kilos of catering left, and a few hours of sleep and time to go to the gym, but you hold back and say to them, “Sorry, we´re on a really tight budget”, when really you would like to say “with the amount you earn, why don´t you go to El Corte Inglés and stop begging”.

A guy came up to me one Friday asking if I had something for his children as he would arrive home late and couldn´t pass by the shop. As far as I´m aware, the Chinese shops are on every street corner and open to all hours in the morning.

Then, so many other replies run through your head:

Legal – If I give you something we might be tried in the Gürtel case.

Quality – I have stuff but it´s not suitable for children.

Humble – Ah, there´s nothing left over.

Sincere – Get lost!

And you go home thankful for not wanting the little marketing gifts which in the end gather up in a drawer, get sent to the basement and after 3 years, when you do the clearing out, they go straight to the trash. To cut a long story short: Can anyone explain why the little gifts and nonsense are these dazzling items that have people falling at their feet?

And now if you´ll excuse me I have to think of a new gift for a fair full of 2000 people where the old age pensioners queue jump asking: “What do you have?” and you tell them “a USB” and they reply, “I don´t know what that is but give me one”. (That´s for another EVENT-uality…)

And despite it all, I´m crazy about my job. Every day I learn something new that helps me in all facets of life.

Best wishes,

Mary Croquette